


Stifling

by mythic0wings



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen, Introspection, Titan Shifters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 08:23:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8364970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythic0wings/pseuds/mythic0wings
Summary: When he's a human, the world feels dull to Eren.





	

**Author's Note:**

> My friend said I should write Titan Eren "for the lulz" and what I got was not lulz.

Suddenly being so tall should be disorienting, it should leave him effectively paralyzed trying to get his bearings. But it doesn’t and all he knows is his goal and that nothing will stop him from achieving it. Thinking like a person, like a _human_ , doesn’t matter so much. It’s an afterthought to his goal no matter how much they scream and yell at him. All that he knows, that Eren knows, is to defeat the monster he has become.

  
It’s not purely rage or even grief that drives him. Revenge seems the simplest label but even that doesn’t feel right now. Still; he’s ruthless when he fights Them. Whatever humanity the other Titans had is long gone so down they fall. Trees cut down from the roots. He’s ripped off limbs, pulped faces, and even tore them apart with his teeth. Strategy just feels… less important when he’s shifted. Yes he can still use it (he had to with Annie; with Bertholt) but it just makes more sense to him to dig into part he can reach.

  
He has gotten Titans with blades and sweeping passes of the 3DMG, though it isn’t the same feeling of victory. The rush it gives him isn’t as strong as when he’s in his Titan form. Like his feelings as a human are somehow dulled after discovering the drive of his Titan form. Privately, he’ll mourn having to be a human.

  
Eren always feels giddy when Shifted; like his muscles could carry him further than their fastest horse and in less time. Sight and sound pound at his brain but he doesn’t from it. Really he’s practically blind unless he’s Shifted. As a human it’s like someone put a thin cloth over his eyes and stuffed cotton in his ears after a day of training. Heavy and dull. Some days his heart feels heavy and all he wishes is to prick a finger or even take a whole chunk out of his palm. It would grow back anyway.

  
Even so he moves forward, pushes through the days when he craves being a figure that towers over those around. Does as he is ordered and strives to live a world trained to kill him. Lives under the leadership of a man entrusted to murder him if he loses himself completely to the beastly mind of his Titan body.

  
Because in the end of it all, he’ll Shift and the world will sharpen and unmuffle and he’ll have a _purpose._


End file.
